Update at the homestead

Thanksgiving was nice. We spent time with my inlaws at Joe's grandmother's house. I always love getting together with everyone, but I also miss my family too. We've had some good Thanksgivings together back home. Joe's mom and dad, aunt and uncle, another uncle, grandmother, brother, sis-in-law and 2 kiddos were all present. Joe's grandmother and mom cooked a big Lebanese dinner complete with kibbi (baked and raw) and grape leaves and cabbage rolls, as well as sweet potatoes, turkey and stuffing, etc. I can't tell you how delicious the food is. Its UNSPEAKABLY great! Joe's mom sent us home with a whole turkey to pick on all this week. Its amazing too.... We weren't allowed to leave without some leftover english peas and kibbi and cabbage rolls.

JOEY IS WALKING. He showed his first signs of cutting loose the Friday before last when we were getting his Christmas photos taken. I was at the photography studio with Evelyn, Joey's babysitter. She was along helping me out with a few things with Joey. He cut loose on his own and took about 8 steps before he fell over. Since then, he's been a maniac on two feet. He prefers to walk now, not crawl. He still enjoys his walker, but he LOVES it when he's allowed to just explore on his own two feet. He's still pretty wobbly, as to be expected, but he'll be master in a few weeks. I was hoping that he'd be on his feet before his 1st birthday. Perfect timing. He turns one on Thursday.

I've been feeling a lot better these days. The weather is growing wet and cold, but this state doesn't call for too much of the cold part. Thank God, because I can't take those Iowa winters. I can if its only for a few days, but not for long periods of time like when I was a kid. No way.

Joey has a few new words - Elmo, cracker, kitty cat, hello, Rudy. Of course they are HIS versions of the words, but you can kind of tell what he's saying. I can, and Joe can, but others probably wouldn't catch on.

Joe has a big presentation tomorrow with the regional representatives to stake his claim on distribution rights for alcoholic beverages for a dry county just south of us as it is expected to be voted wet in about 2 weeks. He's nervous - there's a lot weighing on his shoulders. If they don't get this county, it could be very detrimental to their business. They are already servicing non-alcoholic beverages to the county, but if a surrounding distributor obtains the rights for alcoholic beverages, then that distributorship will also take over distributing non alcoholics. Joe's business will lose sales from within the county on the non-alcoholics, as well as sales from their county line stores. They need this county badly. I honestly don't think there is any chance that they will not get the county as they are closest warehouse to all the customers, as well as the most equipped with trucks, warehouse space, and proper routing. Joe's just nervous because he hasn't been in the business long enough to feel confident that he knows what he's talking about. I think he's going to do just perfect.

We're going to start getting ready for the holidays soon. I've already done a little Christmas "browsing." We can't go crazy this year. We are more limited on funding that ever before, but that's absolutely fine. Its not about that madness anyway. We haven't made our Christmas plans yet, as far as family gatherings but we'll figure that out soon. Joe doesn't have that much time off, if much at all, so we could be tied up here. I hope not. I'd like to make it home to see my family for a few days, and I need to see Addie - she's getting so big and pregnant! :) I haven't been able to be there for her at all through this pregnancy and I have wanted to so badly.

I'm getting so close to finishing the book "The Lovely Bones." I'm really enjoying it. Very interesting and very haunting. I haven't been able to sleep much lately so I'm always up reading between midnight and 2 am. ha!

Inky

Meet the company kitty cat.

Job description: hang out with Joe all day long and guard the door. Oh, and chase mice.

good kitty, kitty.

(((ahhhh-chooooo!!!!)))

My Memorial Day Irony and a Goodbye to My Dear Friend

This night ..... oh this night. It is so ironic that memorial day was yesterday, and observed today.... so ironic.

I was just doing some research on some old friends that I hadn't heard from in a long time. I do that from time to time, to see if anyone has a myspace, or a blog, or any news about what they been up to - that sort of thing. I think of people in my past life that I've lost touch with as life has tugged us our separate ways, and every now and then, when someone comes to mind, I'll look them up.

Tonight, I looked up an old "boyfriend." He was more of a friend than anything, we discovered. We weren't "right" for each other. We were, but then we weren't. We lived two different lives, lived in two different cities, two different occupations. We were drawn to each other though at one point, but for the ultimate purpose, we discovered, was to encourage each other and be essentially, a friend.

His name was Rob Elortegui. He was a navy pilot. And I found out tonight .... that he was tragically killed in a Seahawk accident in September of 2005 off the coast of North Carolina. He was buried 2 days before my birthday. He was the only pilot to be identified in the accident.

My heart breaks. I remember the news, even now. But at that time, they didn't announce the name of the departed. Every time I would turn on the news, I would shutter at the headlines of fallen soldiers, especially navy pilots, as I knew Rob and many of his friends. I remember shuttering specifically at this news because I knew Rob was often off the coast of NC, flying, but it didn't occur to me that it could be him.

Joe used to make fun of me when I would come to work back then, right after I met Rob. I had fallen "in love" with this handsome, intelligent, navy pilot from Florida. I had met him at Autech base on St Andros Island in the Bahamas on one of our military tours. We connected instantly, and were inseparable the entire time I was in the Bahamas. Joe used to call him a "block head" and then laugh at me as I would get mad. It was all at my expense - not Rob's. He just wanted to see me riled up in Rob's defense.

A few weeks after we met and we had both returned to the states, we made plans immediately to meet again. I flew down over New Years to spend the holiday. We had a terrific weekend together. My favorite part of my visit was when all our walls came down and we talked about life. We talked about faith. Up until that point, I was searching for depth in his eyes, and I knew it was there, but he was so guarded, so protective, over his heart. He opened up to me in a way I don't think he had ever done with anyone.

He spoke of his hardships as a child. He was originally from Venezuela. (While we were together, he called his mom and grandmother 3 or 4 times, and spoke ONLY Spanish to them, as English was his second language, but one could never detect this in his fluent English dialect.) His mother and father divorced when he was young, and he and his younger brother were sent to live with his father and his new wife (or, wives, as it became over time, as divorce after divorce left Rob and his brother jossled around from family to family). Rob and his younger brother were mistreated severely by these rich entitled women who claimed Rob's father as their own
, and Rob and his brother were sent to live in the maid's quarters while the step children gained custody of the veloptuous absurdly rich homes. Rob's childhood was no less than a Cindarella story.

His mother had left Venezuela to pursue a law degree in the states. When Rob and his brother were in the mid teens, they were able to move to the states to live with her.

Rob told me of his faith. He said that if he hadn't have become a pilot, he would have become a priest. His faith was the only thing that brought him out of the wreckage of home.

His demeanor was one of gentleness. He was a gentle giant. His stature - just like Joe. A rock. Square jaw. Solid.

Joe, to this day, still picks on me about Rob. He knows that I fell hard for him, but our relationship was eventually translated into a beautiful friendship, as we realized our differences, chalked them up to good times, and agreed to stay in touch over time. Joe often says with a smile and chuckle, mostly in reference to Rob, "I have to watch out! I'm a goner if you catch eye of a Navy Pilot!" I always say "That's right baby! That's my WEAKNESS!!!"

The last time that Rob and spoke was late 2004. I would email him every now and again to check in and see how he was, and to see if he was getting lonely out on the high seas, as they would go out to sea for MONTHS at a time - sometimes up to 9 months solid. Sometimes I would hear back from him, but not often. After Joe and I got married, he crossed my mind every now and then, but of course, not all that often.

He crossed my mind out of nowhere yesterday, and tonight, I decided to take a second to google him.

My heart is broken, but I'm so glad that I found this out. He was a beautiful man - on the outside, yes. But on the inside - 1000 times more. You know, sometimes, I just don't understand why the Lord takes the good ones - the ones that touch peoples' lives and hearts, simply by just "being."

My friend Rob ... I know you are in heaven tonight. I know that with every ounce of my being, and I'm so, so happy that you are with our God. Rest in eternal peace my friend......

No Chance

Have you ever been so overwhelmed that you'd rather sit down and cry?

That's how I'm feeling today. To many little bitty stupid things to do, cluttering my big things to do. I have dreams. I have ambitions. I can get those things done if I didn't have to spend 3 hours on the phone with Hewlett Packard because the 3rd All-In-One printer/copier/fax machine is proving itself to be the 3rd piece of crap they've sent me to replace the original. (I spend the first hour on the phone with India, the PC department - after I've selected the MAC dept - trying to explain to the dummy that he can't help me and to transfer me IMMEDIATELY to MAC, where they speak perfect English.).

And I could be free if I didn't have to straighten out mis-charged bills.

And I could be without stress if AT&T didn't send me 5 bills a month instead of one, like it is SUPPOSED TO, and not overlap the charges.

And I could study my ambitions if Quicken would work right, and download my finances properly from my online banking.

.... if I didn't have so many things cluttering my house that I can't put away yet because THOSE THINGS represent things that I still have yet to finish.

...if I didn't have to do dishes. (I know I have to do this...)

.... if I didn't have to clean my house. (I know I have to do this too....most of the time I don't mind.)

I can't even enjoy my book.

I'm just ..... ugh. I just want to throw things, sometimes. Just wing 'em across the room. I need a day off - being a full time mom is great - but dammit if I DON'T NEED A DAY OFF TOO.

No chance in hell.

"The Lovely Bones"

I don't read much. I think it shows in my writing...a lot. I love to write, but I notice that I could write better and more expressively (and with much less spelling error) while I was in college, when I started journaling everyday. I "practiced" with my journaling as well as my reports and assignments.

But last Thursday, I took a fast trip to Nashville to visit Heather and Daniel in the hospital when Gavin was born, and I crashed at Anne's place that night. She was telling me about a book called The Lovely Bones by Anne Sebold (and just recently found out that they are making a movie out of the book). I started reading that book, which I found on her guest bedroom shelf that evening before I went to bed, and I could NOT put it down.

I read slow. THat comes from a long history of A LOT of detailed reading since 8th grade, where my classes were so difficult, college was a breeze. I used to have to read EVERY SINGLE WORD in order to not miss anything, as my tests were absurdly nit-picky. Once I arrived in college, the reading was actually a lot lighter, but I carried my detailed reading with me, and my extensive note-taking. TO read a book for pleasure for me is absolutely unheard of, as I can't just READ a book. I don't trust that I can remember details of the book the next time I pick it up to continue where I left off before.

I decided to take a chance on reading again. I want Joey to read more than I did. I can't say that I've read any great classics and I feel less rounded because of that. I have less time now, but I want to make time to do so.

Anyway, I started this book ... and I love it. Its so interesting. I'm barely to page 100 and I've had 2 reading sessions. I wish I could read faster. Its driving me nuts. But I'm enjoying the read. Anne brought me a book this weekend that I'm going to read next, IF I finish The Lovely Bones. Its called "The Secret Life of Bees" by Sue Monk Kid.

So much to do today. I have several projects in the air, but I'm so sleepy I can barely keep my eyes open. Coffee is brewing, and so I'm going to get to work....

Great weekend

What a great weekend.

Anne was here this weekend, our dear friend and neighbor in Nashville. She's the greatest on so many levels. Not many come with a heart like hers. We're blessed to have her.

Last night we went to a Delta Waterfowl fundraising event in Drew MS. Whew. Very interesting mix of people. We had a great time. It was about 5 different shades of red in there though. They had a silent and live auction of hunting gear and duck photos. Hunting is not really my "thing" but I go along with to these little events because (a) Joe's company sponsors the events with beer and prizes, and (b) Joe LOVES to hunt. ((I'm not against it - I actually have hunting in my blood - but I just didn't really grow up hunting, although my grandfather would rather hunt than eat. I support Joe's love, and I'm interested in learning about it, so these events are more "educational" to me than anything.)) We bought some raffle tickets and sure enough, we won a single shot 12 gauge shot gun. HA!

The first and last time I shot a gun was almost 2 years ago. Joe and I went on a duck hunt with our friends Danny and Charisse. Charisse and I were along for the ride, basically. We had a great time nagging Danny and Joe because they couldn't shoot a duck to save their lives. Joe handed me the gun and said I could have a go. I'm not comfortable AT ALL around guns so I was nervous. He helped me position the gun and when the next set of ducks flew in and began to fold up, I aimed and fired.

BANG!

Next thing I remember was my arm was in TERRIBLE pain. The kick had moved the butt of the gun to my shoulder and damaged the ligaments. I haven't been able to throw a ball since.

The gun we won last night is the same gauge shotgun that ripped my shoulder to pieces, so I will probably give that gun to Joey when he's old enough. Maybe.

Anyway, the best part about last night was Anne had a guy ask her if she was single. "Yeah, I'm not married." "Well!!!!" he said, "why don't you just come over here and sit down on my lap and pretend I'm Santa Claus!" in a half-drunken slur. "Why don't we pretend I'm sitting in my car getting ready to drive away," I believe she replied. Jerk. Who does that?

Anne left this afternoon. I was so sad to see her go. She is just the kind of person that every one needs to emulate - full of love, compassion, honesty, and faith - and not to mention a twisted sense of humor. She had us ROLLING!